self-care self-love

Debunking Self-care Myths

Self-care is very confusing and is always misunderstood.

And it is not surprising that there are many myths and misconceptions about self-care that cause us to run away from it.

Self-care is surrounded by ambiguities and here in this post, we will try to deal with some of them.


I myself have very often got confused between self-care and being selfish and thus have always treated myself the worst.

I have already written another post that states how I distinguish between self-love and being selfish. I think that will help you too. I recommend reading it once here: Self-love or being selfish?

Here in this post, we are going to discuss the myths and misconceptions that people often have about self-care and thus they consider it a negative or unacceptable act.

self-care myths

We are going to break some stereotypes about self-care and also understand why it is necessary and a healthy habit.

Self-care is an act of compassion and empathy towards ourselves that we do and is healthy as it makes us more self-aware and self-reliable.

It’s all or nothing.

Many people self-care is about doing big things for our own happiness, like taking big vacations, buying gifts for ourselves, taking ourselves to treats, and doing anything big that is luxurious and expensive.

Yes, these things may show or help towards self-care and self-love but these are not the only things that can be an act of self-care.

self-care is about small things

It is not about the big things that you may or may not be able to do for yourself, but it is about the small things and pleasures that comforts you and pleases you.

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People are so into this myth that they don’t think what they want or like but they just do this luxurious and expensive stuff thinking that it may make them feel good.

Reading a nice book, having tea alone, feeling the morning breeze, and doing whatever small or big that you like will give you the real sense of self-care or self-care.

Self-care is a luxury.

Another myth about self-care is that it is a luxury and can only be had with money.

Many people think that self-care or self-love is the luxury that only the richest can have as they have time and money and all the resources to spend on themselves.

But who said that you need all these to take care of yourselves.

self-care and simplicity

As I have already mentioned, self-care is not about only doing things for yourselves but it is about doing things that you like.

It does not have to be expensive, big, or complex.

It can be as simple as meditating, reading a book, taking a walk, spending time alone and whatever that pleases and comforts you because it is about you and for you.

Self-care is being selfish.

This one is the myth that I myself have believed in for very long and have followed it blindly.

I have been under the impression that care about myself is an act of being selfish and thus it should not be done.

But the truth is far from it and I understood it the hard way when I suffered from self-doubt and low self-esteem.

I have mentioned all about it and what is the difference between self-love and being selfish here.

self-love or selfish

Self-love is not being selfish.

There is a very clear difference between both.

Selfish says: “Only I matter.”
Self-love says: “Everyone matters including me.”

Selfishness is thinking and caring about only yourself, while self-love is thining and caring about everyone but prioritizing yourself.

Watching TV, movies, drinking is self-care.

What is the first thing that you feel like doing when you are told that you are free to do anything?

It is something bad, something mischievous or something not so good, right?

That is human nature and that is what we try to do when we are thinking about self-care or self-love.

We think watching TV, movies, drinking, chilling out, sleeping, procrastinating under the name of self-care is the answer.

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I have even seen people who truly believe that these activities are an act of self-care.

healthy activities

But it is not.

Self-care is about doing good to and for yourselves.

It is and it should be focused on healthy activities.

Activities that help you relax, feel better, feel comfortable, feel pleased, and amazed.

Sleeping, watching TV or movie can make you feel better once or twice or for a short amount of time but it is not a permanent solution or a good activity.

Self-care needs to be done regularly and thus the action of self-care should be focused on healthy activities.

Overdoing yourself.

Have you ever felt exhausted even if you had not done enough work or activity?

This is because you are mentally exhausted.

We are so busy with our work, activities, and life that we forget we are humans and not machines.

We are so desperate to achieve our goals and deadlines that we exhaust mentally.

denying self-care

We deny the need to take care of ourselves and thus tend to burnout.

This leads to various mental and physical issues.

Read Also: 7 food to maintain good mental health

You should definitely set goals and work hard to achieve them but you should also take care of yourself.

You should never forget or deny that you need to take care of yourself.

Self-care takes a lot of time.

Time has become luxury and not everyone can have it, right?

And this myth revolves around this luxury.

You may have seen people ignoring others and trying to escape from some tasks or activity by saying they are busy and they don’t have time.

But the irony is that they do this to themselves too.

They ignore or skip taking care of themselves because they think it is time-consuming and that time is not worth spending on themselves.

Read Also: Know your worth

time consuming

First of all, you should always have time for at least yourself.

If self-care takes time then you should have that time or you should make time for it because it is for no one else but you that you are going to benefit from this time.

Second, self-care does not take as much time you the myth or assumption goes.

It is more about quality than the quantity and if you have a healthy self-care activity like meditation or reading a book then it takes not more than 10-15 minutes. It all depends on you.

So instead of trying to escape from it, try to escape for it.

It is an obligation.

If you make it a rule, people won’t like it and that is what this myth tries to present self-care as.

People think it is an obligation and once you start it or once you select certain activities as self-care activities, you cannot change it or switch it.

And thus even if some people start taking care of themselves, because of this same routine or obligation some people try to stop it.

But in reality, self-care habits and methods can be changed, modified, and adapted as per your will.

These activities are for no one else but you so you do not have to follow any rules or obligations.

You can change, switch, or modify your self-care activities and methods as per your choice and will.

Read Also: Who is your best friend?

There are some of the self-care myths that I think are very common and needed a debunking.

I would again like to repeat that self-care is for your own good.

When to do it, how to do it, in what way to do it and everything else about self-care should be decided by only you.

It should be focused on healthy activities that help you feel relaxed, comfortable, and pleased.

Do not fall prey to any of these self-care myths or let them stop you from taking care of yourself.

Do you know any more self-care myths or feeling like I may have missed anything, then flood the comments section below with all your thoughts?

I am all ears.


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